Aḍris ufrin, arraz a1u (ikziku), unbir 2021

Tameṭṭut

Tura-t tmarut Mina Aggaz-Yeḥyawi

Qqaren : « Argaz, d lsas ; tameṭṭut, d ajgu alemmas ». D tidet!! D awal s wazal-is. Mi ara yeɣli ujgu, tazeqqa ad trab ɣer lsas. Ad d-yehtuti ssqef-is ara d-yeglun s yiɣerban-is. Akken i tḍerru d uxxam ideg tenser tmeṭṭut seg wagens-is…

Akken nella: nekk d nekkenti; d kemm akked kunemti, mebla ma nettu nettat d nutenti!! Udem amezwaru, yemlal d wudem wis sin, ddukklen d wudem wis kraḍ. Unti, yecrek asuf d usget ur ten-yenkir deg yimesli. Yessemlal tin yettmeslayen d tin iwumi nettmeslay, ur yerri deg rrif tin ur neḥdir deg yimesli… 

Ih, d acu-yi?! D acu-anteɣ?!... Nekk, d amdan, fruriɣ-d ɣer ddunit d tameṭṭut; deg usget, d tilawin…Tiltin-iw, ur tt-frineɣ deg tudert!! Ur xtareɣ d acu ara iliɣ deg ddunit meqbel ad d-laleɣ ɣur-s!! Limmer ad iyi-sextaren deg yiɣersiwen iteddun, tili ad iliɣ d tizerzert, d taɣzalt yettazzalen s tlelli. 

Limmer ad iyi-sextaren deg leḍyur yettɛellin deg tegnewt ɛlayen, ad ferneɣ d tasekkurt yesmirjiḥen ṣṣut-is yuweḍ agemmaḍ akkin. Limmer ad iyi-sextaren deg yibeɛɛac yettafgen, tili ad iliɣ d aferṭeṭṭu ireqmen; yal tiɣmi teɣma deg-s, tefka-as ccbaḥa deg tmuɣli. Maca ttwaxelqeɣ-d seg yimdanen, fernen-iyi d tameṭṭut ara yeddren…

D tameṭṭut, ara yilin: d tayemmat, d tawetmat, d tmeddakkelt, d tameṭṭut i urgaz, d tajidat mi ara timɣur… Ma lliɣ, ur iyi-tselleḍ ara!! Ma ulac-iyi, ur d-ttiliɣ ara !! Akken yebɣu lliɣ, ad iliɣ kan d tameṭṭut!! D tagrumma n wafrayen, n yiḥulfan. D ccbaḥa n tudert. D leqbaḥa n yimeṭṭawen. D ccwal n yiɣeblan. 

D abrid  isawnen i tikli. D adrar ibedden i walluy. D urrif iheyyan i uɛebbi… Taḍsa-w, d imeṭṭi yedreg wudem-iw! Lferḥ-iw, d lqerḥ yeddurin tayri-w! Ussan-iw, d adawi n leǧruḥ xas yuges wul-iw! Tudert-iw, d asefru n tiɛuggent ur d-nsuli awal-iw!…

Ih, nekk, d tameṭṭut!!…

Tawacult-iw, tesɛa-yi-d ɣer tudert akken ad xedmeɣ fell-as. Akken ad as-cebbḥeɣ udem, ur tt-ttcemmiteɣ deg udrum irkelli. Akken ad refdeɣ isem-is, ad yecbu iṭij mi ara d-yeflali. Akken ad beddeɣ ɣef uxxam ur yetthuddu, ur iɣelli. Akken ad refdeɣ amuḍin-is yeṭṭsen deg tesga ur d-yuki…

Argaz-iw, yuɣ-iyi akken ad as-beddeɣ d tacmuxt ur tettruẓ ara, telha kan i uɛebbi. Akken ad iliɣ am tfunast n yigujilen: ur tettnuz, ur trehhen; tekka-d leswaq d tirni!! Akken ad yewwet yis-i iɣeblan n tudert, ad ibedd ur ikennu i lemḥani. Akken ad icebbeḥ ussan-is, ad ǧuǧǧgen ad lhun, iṭij ad d-yecreq, ur yettɣummu s usigna n cctawi. 

Akken ad yesɛeddi akud-is deg tudert, ad yezhu yis-i. Ma rfiɣ yiwen wass neɣ ɛyiɣ seg ucali, ad yenkeṛ kulci, ad yetti fell-i am tata yettbeddilen tiɣmi; am wakken yettwabeddel-d mačči d win ukkud ddreɣ iḍelli…Arraw-iw, tteklen fell-i akken ad asen-iliɣ d tamḥaddit n wuguren-nsen deg tmetti. Akken ad asen-iliɣ d tamejjayt yettdawin kulci.  D tamɛiwent deg tudert-nsen, xas tazmert teǧǧa-iyi….

I nekk: d anwi ara ibedden yid-i akken ur ɣelliɣ s tderrit n tudert deg ubrid mi ara d-tezgi?! D anwi ara afeɣ mi ara yejreḥ wul, ifelleq seg leɛtab n lemḥani?! D anwi iɣef ara sendeɣ mi ara teknu tfekka seg uɛebbi?! D anwi ara isefḍen imeṭṭi iɣellin ɣef tsumta deg ttnaṣfa n llyali?! 

D anwi ara iyi-dawin ccfawat ineǧren d ccwami seg waṭṭan n ccḥani?! D anwi ara yejjin ul ifellqen ur yeɛlim yis-s ala Rebbi?! D anwi ara iyi-yeddun deg lebɣi mi ara yerreẓ d tirni?! I targit-iw, d anwa abrid ara tawi ma yella deg wanu n tudert i tezder, teɣli?!...

Tameṭṭut, talalit-is, d ccwal: ula d taɣratin ur d-llint fell-as; tɣunza-tt tmetti, terra-tt d tisigert ur as-nehwi. Zzwaǧ-is, d aɣilif imi ur teẓriḍ d acu yedreg yimal-is neɣ azekka anda ara d-teggri, s anda ara tt-yawi. Ddunit-is, d asebbel: seg tlalit ɣer tmettant, nettat d anaḍeḥ akken ad tbedd, ad tili.

https://sadbendali.blogspot.com/2021/12/adris-ufrin-arraz-a1u-unbir-2021.html